If it's wrong, I've probably said it...
Published on July 4, 2004 By chiprj In Blogging
On Friday, July 2, I went to my first funeral since being selected for the duty. It was a small service at the cemetery and the family only requested Taps and a flag presentation, so it was only a two person job. On Thursday, I met with the Senior Airman that volunteered to work with me and we talked through our duties and then practiced a little.

The SRA's only duty, really, was to "play" Taps and salute. The military realized years ago that it didn't have nearly enough real buglers for all the funerals being requested. So, for a few years, the fix was to carry along a boom box and play taps on a cd. I have never seen this done but I can't believe that this was a good idea. It just doesn't seem right. About a year or so ago, I read an article about new electronic bugles the military bought. These things look just like real bugles, except there is a small speaker and button inside the horn(?) end. It plays taps while the "bugler" puts the bugle to his/her lips and mimics playing. To the casual viewer (and listener), it seems that the servicemember is truly playing and (IMHO) it preserves the solemnity of the ceremony in a way that the boom box never could. While it's not as good as a real bugler, I am glad we had one instead of a boom box.

On Friday, we met and drove out to the cemetery. As this was my first funeral, I wanted to arrive extra early so I would have plenty of time to walk to grounds and decide where to position my bugler. We ended up having plenty of time to figure out where we would both stand before the ceremony and then we talked through our duties again for a while to pass the time as we waited.

About 10 minutes early, we took our positions and almost immediately people began to arrive. It was at this time I began to feel nervous. I ran over in my mind what I would do from start to finish.

The ceremony was short. The minister said a few words and then told the assembly that the military would pay honors. I think I did well until about halfway through Taps. The emotion of the moment hit me while I stood saluting at the end of the casket, with the flag right in front of me. I don't think I showed it on the outside, but it did feel like a kick in the stomack. At the end of the song, I lowered my salute and took the flag from the casket. I then marched over to the next of kin, a man and woman (a son and daughter of the deceased) and presented the flag to them.

I had trouble making eye contact with them. They held there hands out for the flag and I could see the war on their faces - I can only imagine the conflict inside them. They clearly wanted the flag (I believe because it would forever be a reminder of their father's service), but their hands shrank back for a moment as I extended the flag toward them.

As for what I had to say, well, as I said, the emotion started to get to me during Taps and got no better when I saw the faces of the man and woman. I stumbled through my lines, nearly forgetting what I had to say halfway through. I managed to get it all out but it was very difficult.

It was only the second day of the two months period when I am a member of the detail responsible for funerals and I know that there will be more. I do not look forward to doing another, but I am in some way relieved a little. I wasn't sure if I could do the detail justice, but I have now. While I do not look forward to doing another, I know now that I can do my duty with strength and honor.

Comments
on Jul 06, 2004
Well done chip.